Friday Fish Fry: Felon in the family, Measure T, Garbage island, no pregnant women on train

How to negate Trump's huge lead with white males without a college degree

THE KEY TO A DEMOCRATIC VICTORY ... Polling from the previous two presidential runs by Donald Trump, as well as his current campaign, reveals that his greatest area of support comes from white men without college degrees, where he has a whopping 41-point lead.

The solution for Democrats is simple: Get every so-called "liberal" university in Wisconsin, Michigan, Pennsylvania, North Carolina, Georgia, Arizona and Nevada to immediately grant college degrees to white men who don't have one.

My advice is free.

PREGNANT WOMEN BEWARE ... Saw this sign the other night as several of our family members were about to board the "Cow Train" at Bobby Dazzler's fabulous pumpkin patch just off Highway 113 between here and Woodland.

"No Pregnant Riders."

What would J.D. Vance have to say about such a rule?

Wonder if childless cat ladies are banned too?

FELON IN THE FAMILY ... One of my many sisters, who shall remain nameless, called to ask me how I had voted on one of the several propositions on the statewide ballot.

I asked her directly, "Are you trying to ascertain how I voted my ballot?" and she said "Yes, I haven't voted and I know you study these propositions closely, so I thought I could get some brotherly advice."

That may all seem well and good, but on Page 137 of the State of California Official Voter Information Guide, under "What Activities Are Prohibited" is the statement, "DO NOT attempt to ascertain how a voter voted their ballot."

There is no family exception.

The headline at the top of the page states, "WARNING: CORRUPTING THE VOTING PROCESS IS PROHIBITED!"

(Exclamation points should also be prohibited.)

"Violations subject to fine and/or imprisonment."

Last time I checked, she has not been able to make bail.