The Night Before Christmas in a Galaxy Far, Far Away

A favorite Christmas memory from long ago

(Note: I wrote a column titled "The Night Before Christmas in a Galaxy Far, Far Away" on Christmas Eve of 1978 and shared it with readers of The Davis Enterprise. Several years later I explained how the column had spread far and wide even before there was an internet. I share both the original column and the explanation here now.)

A few days ago I received an email from a man who is both an English professor and a freelance writer in Cleveland. He said he was conducting some research for an article he was writing for the “Official Star Wars Website” and had somehow tripped across a column I had written at Christmas time in 1978.

The column was titled “The Night Before Christmas in a Galaxy Far, Far Away” and was written as Star Wars mania was sweeping the country.

My newfound friend from Cleveland wondered “whose idea was it to incorporate Star Wars into a Christmas story?” and also wanted to know “how did you come up with it and why did you write it?”

The answers to those questions are simple. The idea came about because my 4-year-old son, Ted, was incredibly taken with Star Wars, and his unbridled enthusiasm pulled me along as well. I wrote it as a Christmas present of sorts that I could read to him.

Because Ted was much more attuned to Star Wars than I was, he served as my technical adviser on the project, which started on a Saturday afternoon and stretched almost to the stroke of midnight.

Much to my surprise, the day after the piece ran in The Davis Enterprise, the folks at United Press International called and wondered if they could “put it on the wire.”

In those pre-internet days, this would be the equivalent of posting it online, given that UPI was a large news service that many newspapers across the country subscribed to.

No, it didn’t go “viral,” but the first evidence I received that it had traveled beyond the Davis city limits came in a phone call from my Uncle George that he and Aunt Sally had seen it in the Ukiah Daily Journal in Mendocino County.

Soon thereafter came reports from aunts, uncles, cousins and friends in Oregon, Ohio, North Dakota, South Dakota and deep in the heart of Dixie that they too had seen it in their local newspapers.

None of them said that it was very good, just that they had seen it. Nevertheless, I was thrilled at the attention and certain that a Pulitzer could not be far behind.

Ted is no longer 4 years old, but he now has three little boys and a little girl of his own, all of whom marvel at the wild collection of Star Wars toys that Ted has lovingly held onto from those wonderful days so many years ago.

So, at the risk of being accused of self-plagiarism, here is that piece from Christmas of 1978.

THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS IN A GALAXY FAR, FAR AWAY

‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the void, not a creature was stirring, not even a droid;

The stockings were hung in the Starship with care, in hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there;

Chewbacca was nestled all snug in his bed, while visions of Stormtroopers danced in his head;

And Princess Leia in her kerchief and I with my pipe, had just settled down for a long winter’s flight;

When out on the X-Wing there arose such a clatter, I sprang from my command post to see what was the matter;

Away to the window I flew like a blazer, threw open the shutters and pulled out my laser;

What to my wondering eyes should appear, but a miniature Land Speeder and eight tiny reindeer;

With a little old driver so lively and quick, I feared for a moment this was a Darth Vader trick;

Soon up to the Starship so quickly they flew, with a Land Speeder full of toys and St. Nicholas too;

I drew in my head and opened the latch as jolly St. Nicholas squeezed through the hatch;

He was dressed all in fur from his toes to his snout, and his clothes were all tarnished with meteor fallout;

He had a broad face and a big black shoe, and his body was so round he looked like R2-D2;

But the wink in his eye and the dimple on his chin soon gave me to know the Force was with him;

He drank all our milk, but he ate just one cookie, then unpacked his gifts for C-3PO and Wookiee;

He spoke not a word but left piles of toys, then roared off in his Land Speeder to a deafening noise;

He took to the sky without giving his name, but before he disappeared I heard him exclaim;

“For the children of the universe these toys are well suited, but I’m sorry to say, batteries are not included.”

Reach me at bobdunning@thewaryone.com

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